April 2010

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Green Flash Barleywine

April 25, 2010 in Beer Reviews, Holy Beer Contenders | No comments

I’m renting this wonderful little place on a corner lot … on an island. Think about that for a second. A corner lot on an island. It’s where the beach turns a corner.

On the very corner of this island is another little island, just big enough for a medium sized tree and a hammock. I am on that hammock.

There are no big waves on this side. If there were, it might take me out. But it’s nice and calm, and instead of booming and hissing, the water here is calm and makes little wet lapping sounds. In the distant there’s the occasional cry of a seagull, about once every 92 seconds, like clockwork.

Popping off the cap with the opener on my key chain, I relax here, taking in this calm Zen moment in the whirlwind of my life, and take a deep sniff of the Green Flash Barleywine.

Nothing. I can hardly smell anything. I don’t know if that’s because of this brew, or if it has something to do with the functioning of my nose at this moment. (Or should I say, non-functioning?)

I take a deep breath, clear my mind, and raise the heavy bottle to my lips. The first sip is wonderfully malty – it tastes of toasty malt, very much like a biscuit, all swallowed up in a wave of tingly bubbles. Next is a passage of a vodka, alcohol taste, something to let me know this brew means serious business. Then again, this is barleywine – if it didn’t have a serious alcohol punch, there’d be something wrong with it.

After that, it finishes with a nice rising tide of hoppy bitterness. Very good. Indeed, it’s delicious. And it’s perfect for enjoying on a hammock on the sea shore.

I’d give this a decent 6 on the Holy Grail scale and proclaim it an official groovy brew.

This review transcribed from handwritten notes taken in 2009.

Sharps Non-Alcoholic

April 18, 2010 in Beer Reviews, Non-Alcoholic | No comments

Get ready for a shock.

Are you ready? I mean, are you braced for it? Yes? Okay, here goes…

I like this stuff.

Okay, I know my accumulating months of brewski self-depravation may be causing some sort of dementia in my brain, but Sharps is not bad at all. I doubt I would have said this in December 2009, but here, now, I’m saying it.

What’s doubly strange is that I like it even though I can sum it up with these three words: Tangy Barley Water

As with other non-alcoholic reviews I’ve been posting, please bear in mind I am not comparing this to actual beer. Sharps, such as it is, is not bad. It’s tangy, has some good satisfying carbonation, and gives you a nice barley flavor spiked with hops.

Not a whole lot of hops, but enough to enjoy.

You could also think of it as beer flavored water. In a pinch, or in my cause, a drought, it does the trick.

As often as not, that’s all that’s required.

Imported Kaliber Non-Alcoholic

April 13, 2010 in Beer Reviews, Non-Alcoholic | No comments

Kaliber

I had this a few nights ago with a really nice cut of rare steak, some potatoes, and asparagus. During this excellent meal, Kaliber tasted almost exactly like a Guinness Stout. I was in heaven.

Without the meal, drinking it all on its own, is another story.

When you pop the top and take that first sniff, all is well. It has that familiar and welcoming scent of dark roasted malt and yeast.

Raising it to the lips, taking that first swig, the illusion holds for about 18 seconds. Maybe. I think. Could be that I’m giving it the benefit of the doubt, because the more I think about it, the more it seems like 12 seconds.

There’s a rush of dark toasted malt with strong hints of rye bread. That part is all good. Then it fades to a disappointing burnt taste that reminds me of blackened bread crust. Yeah, you know … been in the toaster too long? The carbonation is thin and disappears almost instantly, leaving it about as flat as it can be without actually being flat.

All this sounds very negative, and that’s not really fair. For a non-alcoholic brew, it’s not bad at all.

With a good hearty meal, it’s excellent.